Feeling good becomes a continuous challenge as one gets older and his/her social engagements continue to drop from the peaks of corporate, family or social networking, which allowed the “feel good” factor to flourish.
This is to be expected, however people who are entering or encountering such a phase in their lives sometimes struggle to deal with the challenge. It is more because they did not hone their strategy of continuous engagement with all their networks before hitting the slow down. Once such a slow down occurs, the struggle starts and re-connection with networks becomes an issue as the position from which one used to operate is now gone. It might appear that others tend to ignore you, but that is mostly not the case. Compounding this issue is the global scenario which sometimes makes anyone feel despondent. It appears the world is splitting at its seams with unnecessary conflicts.
Feeling good is a critical aspect of living well. It is crucial to keep going with a positive mindset and orientation towards life and others who are involved with you. It may be simple things like catching up with someone you have known for a while and just talking shop – like what is happening around the world, how is the weather shaping up, who is doing what, etc., The smiles and the bonhomie of meeting with someone known to you are important elements of every engagement, and keeps you full of life’s zest.
When we work in a corporate or academic setting, there are always lots of things to do, meetings to attend, deadlines to meet, targets to chase, and friends to network with. Life is full of activities and actions which keep you moving from one day to the next, looking forward to the future in a continuous but relentless fashion. Things happen, or you have to make things happen, you need to collaborate with lots of folks, talk to remote colleagues, prepare pitches to present to or convince a client, and so on and so forth. This non-stop series of activities slows down at some stage, and then declines completely once you retire from active duty.
The ability to feel good on shaping things in corporate life drops down, as the retired life is all about shaping yourself to face the oncoming uncertain future – may be you shape your spouse as well so that the journey to future could be congruous. Suddenly, the scope and variety of challenges and problems to solve reduce dramatically. Your kids have grown up and moved on. The only thing which can then keep you engaged in life is to develop a meaning or strong purpose.
A strong meaning or purpose lends a sense of direction to you, and as you keep executing and fulfilling the duties generated by that purpose, you achieve a sense of fulfillment, which in turn leads to a feeling of positivity and goodness. About yourself and about others around you. This is a very important feeling which we all should aim to achieve during every day of our lives. It makes your life credible and purposeful, with a sense of orientation towards accomplishing meaningful objectives, similar to what you were doing during your corporate life.
I assign a huge value to feeling good. I used to drink a glass of chardonnay every other evening and reminisce on what I have done during the day; but now that I have given up drinking, I do the same thing with a glass of oat or almond milk (which have become my favourite drinks, along with soda/tonic water when I go out pubbing). I was (and still am) able to focus on the positive aspects of the day to day interactions and engagements with a glass of wine. The feel good factor stayed with me till I went to sleep, and I believe it was a strong reason why I never struggled to sleep.
So, in a nutshell, I am advocating that you develop a sense of purpose – you should have meaning in your life. Think about your life and its impact on others around you. What have you done to help people? Did you mentor anyone? Did you help your colleague solve an intractable problem? Was that person happy with your help? Did you walk out of the office everyday feeling a sense of accomplishment or satisfaction on the role you had played during the day?
If the responses to the above questions are positive, then your ability to feel good is firmly in place. And, once that feeling is in place, you would look at the world around you in a positive manner. You would go out of your way to help the destitute, or your neighbours. You would not discriminate against anyone. Your helpful dispensation will not go unrecognized by the people around you, your colleagues, your neighbours and the society at large.
All this make a big difference to your own life, and it could well mean that you would live longer than the average life mortality figure. You have a strong reason to exist, and that would keep you going. This is despite all the reasons to feel down in today’s uncertain world. This is despite all the wars, conflicts, and other bad things which happen in the world every day.
So, feeling good is essential. Always aim to feel good about yourself, your family and friends. Don’t forget it has a direct impact on your mental well-being and health.
3rd June 2018